Aspartame Placebo

Track List:

Angsty Teen Seuss

(MP3)

Lyrics: James Vandenberg

Arrangement: Manfire

I look at you, you look at me. Look at you, look at me. Look at us. I hate all you, you hate all me. Hate at you, hate at me. Hate at us.

CHORUS:

I am in pain, in pain I am. My soul is black, my soul is blue. I am in pain, in pain I am. If I were you, what would you do.

Are you sure now, now are you sure? Sure as hell, sure as hell, shores of hell. Can't you tell that you can't tell me? Now you tell, now you tell, never tell.

I have no soul, no soul to sell. Sold on eBay, highest bid, got the lot. Well I'll be fine. Fine, I'll be well. Do you care, do we care, I care not.

BRIDGE (or poker):

The cat in the hat came back and he was mad. The cat in the hat don't care if we'd been bad.

I wish I knew, know what I wish? Will they all, will they all, will they fall? Scream at the sun. Son scream at thee. Kill them all, kill them all, kill us all!

Comrades with Tractors

 

(MP3)

Lyrics: Tim Chmielewski

Arrangement: Talysman

Tim Chmielewski comments on his lyrics:

    This song is for Mr John Burrage and Interrobang Cartel can use it if they want it. I thought of it after watching the video clip for the Rentals "Friends of P." 

When Talysman recorded the song, he had never heard of the Rentals, so he conceived of it being more like an A-ha! or After The Fire style new wave song.

Lyrics

ooh woo hoo hoo

He's got a brand new tractor He's out planting potatoes No time to stop and chat The party rests for no one

It's not gonna go for no one Only members of the party It's good for all comrades And I'm mentally singing

Oh yeah, oh yeah, what’s that you see?" Oh boy, find out, what’s up with me Oh yeah, oh yeah, what’s that you see" Tell me, more of what's gonna be

If you’re friends with Tractors Well then you’re comrades with me If you’re down with Tractors. Well then you’re down with me Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. comrades ooh woo hoo hoo

Everyone's got loads of potatoes It's a bountiful harvest I only love the party I will die when I'm 100

Oh yeah, oh yeah, what’s that you see?" Oh boy, find out, what’s up with me Oh yeah, oh yeah, what’s that you see" Tell me, more of what's gonna be

If you’re comrades with Tractors. Well then you’re comrades with me If you down with Tractors. Well then you’re down with me Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. Comrades of Tractors.

If you’re comrades with Tractors. Well then you’re comrades with me If you’re down with Tractors. Well then you’re down with me If you’re comrades with Tractors. Well then you’re comrades with me If you’re down with Tractors. Well then you’re down with me Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors. Comrades with Tractors.

Comrades with Tractors.

Comrades with Tractors.

Comrades with Tractors.

Kibo's Beard Wax

 

(Kibo's Beard Wax MP3)

Lyrics: James "Kibo" Parry

Arrangement: Charlie

In a posting about his current hair color, Kibo set out a challenge to record a song based on the ingredients of his conditioner/wax (listed below). While he probably uses this on both his hair and beard, I liked the title of the song better this way.

INGREDIENTS: Water, Cetearyl Alcohol, Polysorbate-60, Behenamidopropylamine Behenate, Stearalkonium Chloride, Cetrimonium Chloride, Cocodimonium Hydrolyzed Hair Keratin, Hydrolyzed Glycosaminoglycans (Hydrolyzed Mucopolysaccharides), Sodium-Coco Collagen Amino Acids, Wheat Germ Fatty Acids, Linoleic Acid, Linolenic Acid, Arachidonic Acid, Squalane, Avocado Oil, Acetamide MEA, Panthenol, Wheat Germ Oil, Jojoba Oil, Tocopherol, Tocopheryl Acetate, Sulfur, Amodimethicone, Polyquarternium-10, Linoleamidopropyl PG-Dimonium Chloride Phosphate, Tallowtrimonium Chloride, Nonoxynol-10, Cocoyl Sarcosine, Sorbitol, Fragrance, Imidazolidinyl Urea, Methylparaben, Propylparaben

POW WUH

 

(recording in progress)

Lyrics: Matt Mc Irvin

Arrangement: Manfire (in progress)

Matt Mc Irvin suggested that Interrobang Cartel might want to use some of his lyrics for future recording projects. The first such song to be recorded was Chalice of Fire. POW-WUH would make a fine second McIrvin song, and an early demo by Manfire has actually circulated amongst some band members. It's an excellent heavy metal interpretation of the lyrics. Manfire is adding some finishing touches to the track.

Lyrics

    I post to Usenet every day 
    Fill cyberspace with POW-WUH!!!! 
    Everybody thinks I'm cool 
    Because I've got that POW-WUH!!!! 
    I'm the ANTIDOTE for BOREDOM, a 
    Convenience store of POW-WUH!!!! 
    I have a hairier chest than you 
    Because of all that POW-WUH!!!! 

(A million idiotic voices yell the refrain:)

    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 
    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 

    Nobody ever picks on me 
    They're scared of all my POW-WUH!!!! 
    Or steals the money for my lunch 
    I drive 'em off with POW-WUH!!!! 
    My gym teacher can't scare me 
    I triple him in POW-WUH!!!! 
    The bullies in the locker room 
    Start crying from my POW-WUH!!!! 

(Fireworks explode at the rear of the stage:)

    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 
    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 

    Whenever I walk in a room 
    The silence is from POW-WUH!!!! 
    Who cares if I can't drive a stick, 
    The other cars fear POW-WUH!!!! 
    My pimples don't repulse the babes, 
    'Cause they arise from POW-WUH!!!! 
    I don't even have to bathe 
    They only smell the POW-WUH!!!! 

    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 
    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 

(singing and music stop, so audience can chant alone:)

    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 
    POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! POW-WUH!!!! 

(Enormous power chord, and heavy reverb on the big finish:)

POW-WUHWUHWUHWUHwuhwuhwuhwuhwuhwuh.

Pink Noise

(MP3)

Arrangement: Charlie

Lyrics: Micheal

Lyrics

In the morning she comes from a rose colored dream.
A crying bacon alarm clock from the blankets she creeps
She's holding a ticket to the nine o' clock train
And all she could hear was the pink noise
All she could have was a cold bay shanking
All she could hear was the pink noise
and sometimes she's scared of the street where she lives
A cold chorus of classrooms, an endless echo in bells
They want her to pay attention, but she can hardly tell
She looks in their eyes to a mirror maze hell
And all she can hear is the pink noise
All she can have is a cold bay shaking
All she could hear is the pink noise
And a paperback chair is a lonely man's hell
(break)
Her racket of life has caught up and found her
She can't stand the sights or the sounds that surround her
She tunes it all out, and drowns in a Sahara
And she could hear was the pink noise
And the taunts of the boys
And she has to pick up her toys
All she can hear is the pink noise
In the morning she comes from a rose colored dream
A crying bacon alarm clock, from the blankets she creeps
She holding a ticket to the nine o clock train.
The pink noise
The pink noise
The pink noise

Retract Your Lies

(MP3)

Lyrics: Talysman

Arrangement by Charlie

Lyrics

the sight of your username makes me squeal
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
I want to love you with six inches of steel
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
your rambling jokes fall a little flat
and I feel the need to tell you that
I've never met such a ludicrous prat
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
I avoid all froups you choose to infest
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
reading your prose is an endurance test
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
if draining the net of its soul
and spreading boredom is your goal,
congratulations, you're an asshole
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
buddy, let me tell you
you're a menace to the net
you get your kicks molesting kids
while high on drugs, I bet
so I'll follow you forever
and nag you 'til I'm blue
my sacred role is to call you a troll
and smack you with my clue
your continued existence makes me scream
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
it's all a part or your twisted scheme
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
my sock puppets and I all agree
a spelling flame should make you flee
or I will complain to your ISP
RETRACT YOUR LIES!
letting you post is so unfair
it makes me yell and tear my hair
it's *my* internet, and I won't share!
RETRACT!
YOUR!
LIES!

Truckstop Birthday

(MP3)

Lyrics: Kim

Arrangement: Charlie

Album: Aspartame Placebo

This was created as a tribute to a 40th birthday.

Lyrics

Sittin' in a truck stop.
Breathtaking display of sharp-edged, Precambrian cabbages on the window sill.
Life at a precipice point.
Things after today will be different than things were yesterday.
Shuddering circle of belching, wheeled, obelisks give the place a smoky, haunted druidical feel.
Thinking about 40 years.
The sound of choppers - 1965 the first American troops arrive in Vietnam.
The jungle greets them with scary aggressiveness.
Did that cabbage just move?
40 years old.
A quarter in the jukebox, listening to the relentless, ghost, Beatle's voices.
Bonanza reruns play on a ceiling mounted tv set, sound turned off.
40 years gone.
Born into a world where Malcom and King preach freedom.
A world where LA had yet to burn. Selma.
Leoniv in space.
Can he smell the smoke?
Does he hear the gunshot?
Birthday eggs in a diesel powered Stonehenge.
The coffee as Precambrian as the cabbage.
I drink it anyway.
40 years gone.
Bell bottoms, paisley prints, psychedelic colors and go-go boots - all unsafe at any speed.
By 75 we'd been to the moon, found only rocks and dust, decided it was time to focus on aerobics and disco.
Rocky Horror Picture Show, Space 1999 - ten years gone.
By 1985 a man could wear a pink shirt with white suit and shoes, and still be cool in the Miami heat.
Swatch, New Coke
20 years gone
By 95 computer voice announces "we've got mail."
Internet, Playstation
30 years gone.
Truck stop breakfast.
Runny eggs and hash browns.
40 years gone.
Precambrian friend perched on the windowsill.
Companion to a slightly misshapen gold foil ashtray.
A precipice point for you as well.
Things after today, will be different than yesterday.
Your life is changing with mine.
Sop up the last of the egg yoke, with slightly, soggy toast, tuck you under my arm, step out into the asphalt church of interstate transport.
A stolen cabbage - My birthday present to me.

Waiting For The Voodoo Dolls

(MP3)

Arrangement: Major Zed and Charlie

Album: Aspartame Placebo

Lyrics

Lyrics by Major Zed, rights reserved under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 License (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/)

(verse 1:)

Can you explain,
why our lives are run by metal brains?
A billion monkeys hit their keyboards everyday,
we type away a paper hurricane.
;Are we machines?
And if we are we must have robot dreams.
Malfunctioning between the twilight and the dawn,
our visions dance along on neon wings.
;(prechorus:)
;If I climbed through a hole in the ceiling,
would it help me get rid of the feeling
something's missing, something's missing....
;(chorus:)
;But if the voodoo dolls
come in the mail today,
just in time, I had to say.
It's alright, it's alright.
Break 'em in half
because they gotta last.
Back of the shelf or else they go too fast.
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls,
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls.
(verse 2:)
I must admit
my life goes by while I don't notice it.
I eat my ice cream then I see the empty plate,
I can't recall the taste a single bit.
Am I awake?
Or does the dream just take on different shapes?
I seem to remember something 'bout a girl,
holding all the light in the world, is that insane?
(prechorus:)
If I climbed through a hole in the ceiling,
would it help me get rid of the feeling
something's listening, something's hissing....
(chorus:)
But if the voodoo dolls
come in the mail today,
just in time, I had to say.
It's alright, it's alright.
Break 'em in half
because they gotta last.
Back of the shelf or else they go too fast.
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls,
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls.
(bridge: spoken word)
I really only come alive when I'm walking down the bricks to my mailbox.
The air is a dense medium that flows around me as I propel myself through a multidimensional space.
I stand taller than normal, my eyes and ears in a separate plane, parallel to this universe.
My arms and shoulders are charged with ionization as I reach for the handle of the mailbox.
Will it be there? Will it be there? That little gray box from the big gray box?
And inside, like sapphires from the moon, those ninety, perfect, little blue voodoo dolls?
(chorus:)
'Cause when the voodoo dolls
come in the mail today,
just in time, I have to say.
It's alright, it's alright.
Break 'em in half
this time they're gonna last.
Back of the shelf so they don't go so fast.
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls,
I'm waitin' for the voodoo dolls.
(verse 3:)
Do you believe,
your mumbled pleas defeat mortality?
I saw a speeding dumptruck full of cattle bones,
it had to be an omen, don't you see?
Am I to blame,
to chase away these thoughts of future pain?
I only want to find the formula for hope,
then toss it down my throat,
and watch the game.